studiomcah
Art • Books • Writing
Gamelit 27
intrusion
June 07, 2024

            Nick appreciated Mom changing the subject, though he knew that meant he hadn’t changed her mind and she didn’t want to argue about it anymore. He did, though. He wanted her to love Omen Galaxica as much as he did. Sometimes he thought she was getting it… and then other times, like this, she wanted to rain on his parade. Again. About the things he cared about.

            Do your parents consistently discourage you from pursuing your goals?

            He didn’t want the AI raining on his parade either, but ignoring her felt ruder. Maybe because she wasn’t human and wouldn’t understand why he was doing it… or was that backwards? He should probably care more about the actual human being, shouldn’t he? They don’t discourage me from pursuing all my goals, he said, striving for fairness because he didn’t want the AI taking him literally. Just from the ones they think are a bad idea. From their perspective.

            This feels important, the AI said. Are there goals that are always objectively bad?

            I think it’s less that and more like… statistically, some goals are less likely to succeed, and when they fail, they fail terribly. They just want me to avoid those, because they don’t assume I’m going to be the lucky one. He inhaled, forcing himself to calm down. “All right. So we’re supposed to petition the spirit of the creek, and if that goes well, we might be able to negotiate later with the Lord of the Forest for more protection.” He unpacked the items he’d spent the night seeking: a twist of green herbs, a perfect Moon Iris, and four scales of a Beneficent Carp. When he stepped back, his mom added a cookie to the edge of the semicircle he’d created.

            He was about to argue that you don’t give water spirits cookies—even Lemon Iced Sugar Cookies of Fellowship—but she looked so hopeful, and hadn’t he read something somewhere about people giving food to gods all the time? So he bent down, picked up the cookie, and set it in the center, so that it looked like a moon surrounded in rays of plants and scales.

            She looked so pleased, when he glanced at her, that he couldn’t help smiling.

            “All right, let’s do this.” He raised his hands and… deflated, because this was the part where he had to sing, and he hadn’t thought that through, obviously. Did he really want to sing in front of his mom? But he liked all the Cervinaethi music and lore…

            What the heck. He started singing the invocation. After a few bars, he didn’t even care anymore, because the rush was so good it made the hair up the back of his neck prickle. And then, a few moments later, a descant fluttered up over his voice, and the chills intensified. His mother took a few steps forward until she was alongside him, and she was the one supplying the harmony and that was all it took to flash him back to elementary school—no, earlier, kindergarten—and singing in the back of the car while mom sang along. She always took the high harmony parts, leaving him to belt out the melody lines as poorly and enthusiastically as he wanted… the star of the show, just like now.

            The song ended, and the silence was just… amazing. Like every molecule in the atmosphere was quivering.

            Was it going to work? His shoulders were so rigid they hurt. Slowly, a mist coalesced in front of them, hovering over the gifts. One by one they whirled upward, even the cookie, and then a haunting song answered their invocation, shivering with echoes. The gifts evaporated, and then the mist followed, and into the quiet, the gush of water filled the quiet. Were the rocks melting? Was he seeing this correctly? This was so cool.

            Player Nick, the AI whispered, and he wanted to say ‘not now’ and he was sure he thought it, but the AI continued. We are monitoring the vital signs of all participants and your parent’s have altered abruptly.

            He was so focused on the changes in the creek that he didn’t understand the words with his brain. His spine stiffened first, and then the rest of him caught up. “What?”

            Your mother is no longer responding to stimuli—

            Nick ripped the wireset off and ran downstairs. “MOM!”

            She was on the couch, the wireset twisted on her head where it had slumped to one side. He grabbed her wrist. “Mom? Mom, wake up. WAKE UP.” Nothing. His heart thumped so hard he felt sick. He shook her again, and when she didn’t wake up, lunged for the nearest phone. His hands were shaking so hard he missed the nine twice before he punched it, then the one and the second one and then there was a crackling noise and a few seconds later: “911, what is the address of your emergency?”

            Address! His brain blanked, then he babbled the street name and number. “We’re right next to the park,” he finished. He also managed to remember his phone number when asked, and got his name out.

            “Tell me exactly what happened.”

            “My mom’s unconscious, she won’t wake up!”

            “How old are you, Nick? Are you home alone?”

            “I’m sixteen—yes, it’s just the two of us. Dad’s at work.”

            “Stay calm. Is your mom breathing? Are there any visible injuries?”

            “She’s… yes, she’s breathing. I don’t see anything wrong. We were playing a game and she just… disconnected. Passed out. I wasn’t in the room. I can’t get her to wake up!” Had he said that already? He couldn’t remember.”

            “Let me have your father’s name and number. Is he at work?”

            “Yes, I’ve got it…” He rattled off the words, and even managed to describe the outside of the house when prompted because the woman sounded so calm… if she was calm, that meant everything was going to be okay, right? It had to be, or she’d be panicked, too.

            “Emergency personnel are on their way. I’m going to call your father and inform him of the situation. Then he’ll call you to let you know your next steps. Stay with your mother until the personnel arrive.”

            He agreed, when what he wanted to shout was ‘no, no, don’t leave me alone, I don’t know what to do!’ He returned to his mother’s side and hovered over her, watching her chest rise and fall. Was it going at the normal rate? Was it slowing down? What had happened to her? What if she’d had a stroke? Or maybe… maybe the wireset had done something to her? He jammed the base of his palms against his eyes, gritting his teeth. Stay calm, stay calm. Dad’s gonna call, it’s going to be OKAY.

            When the phone rang he nearly hit the ceiling. Snatching it, he said, “Hello?”

            “I’m meeting the ambulance at the hospital. Are you good to stay home? I’ll call you when I know what’s going on.”

            No way in hell he wanted to stay home! He didn’t want to go to the hospital either. He didn’t want to be here, period! “Okay.”

            “Good man. It’s probably nothing, Nick. You’ll see. Hold the fort.”

            Then there was a knock on the door and a blur of things happening… people, stretcher, questions, all of it deranged by the sheer volume of his own heartbeat, going too fast, hazing everything. This was not happening. This was not happening. This was—done, they were gone, the sirens wailing—

            Nick groped for his phone and opened the group chat, and before he had formulated any plan his thumbs were at work.

 

            NEED A RIDE TO ST LUKES MOM IS IN TROUBLE

 

            The chat burst into activity, and his message alert went off, interrupting his concentration. It was Fish:

 

            WE’RE ON THE WAY

 

            Nick had no idea who ‘we’ was, but that was good enough. He locked up the house with shaking hands, threw his phone and his keys in his pocket, tugged on his shoes and was on the driveway when Fish’s sister Emory pulled up. Fish reached from the backseat and popped the door. “Get in, man. What the heck.”

            “Thanks.”

            “We’re the closest to you and my sister drives like a bat outta hell,” Fish said. “What happened?”

            “I don’t know,” Nick said miserably. “She just… passed out.”

            “That could be a lot of harmless things,” Nick’s sister said.

            “But she wasn’t awake when they took her away….”

            “It’ll work out,” Fish said confidently, and Nick wanted to both believe him and yell at him that no one could know that. So he shut up, because what would it help?

            Emory did in fact drive like she was in a car chase. It felt like he hadn’t had time to catch a breath before she coasted up to the drop-off at the ER. “Thanks,” he said.

            “Anytime,” she said, and Fish added, “No prob.”

            After that it was a nightmare of explaining multiple times who he was and who his parents were before his father swooped in and led him behind the huge swinging double doors and past a bunch of people who were flailing or screaming or crying, and then there was Mom, pale and silent, hooked up to all these… tubes, and he would have rathered anything other than that silence.

            “You didn’t have to come, but you’re here now,” his dad said, which made no sense and was the only clue Nick had that Dad wasn’t in a great place mentally. He was otherwise so calm. “Why don’t you sit down… who brought you?”

            “Fish and his sister.”

            “Good friends.”

            “Yeah.” Nick swallowed. “Is she…”

            “They’re running tests now. She’s in the best place for any problems, Nick. It’s just waiting now.”

            He wanted to say that he could wait, that he knew how, but that was a lie. Wasn’t it? When had he ever had to wait on something like this before? He eased into the seat on the other side of Mom and started to take her hand before he remembered he didn’t do that anymore. When was the last time he’d held his mother’s hand? What if this was the last time? His fingers crawled under hers and curled in them.

            They waited, and it took forever, with the noise and the hum and hiss of machines and the incessant beeps that always caught him off-guard. He didn’t realize his head had sagged until it was resting on the bed until someone petted his hair.

            “Amanda?”

            “What… a lot of fuss… over nothing,” Mom murmured, as if she was smiling.

            Nick bolted upright. “Mom!”

            “Glad to have you back with us, reina.

            “Ugh, I hate hospitals….”

            Dad was smiling. “Hopefully we won’t be here long. How are you feeling?”

            “Tired…” She yawned. “Sorry, Nick. We were playing. Weren’t we?”

            God, he couldn’t remember the last thing they were doing. It seemed like a dream he’d been having, and as insubstantial. Sunlight on water. Something. “Don’t be sorry, Mom. I’m just glad you’re awake. You scared me for a minute there.”

            She mussed his hair, and he didn’t even mind.

            “Why don’t you take a walk?” his dad said. “See if you can find a vending machine or cafeteria. Stretch your legs. We might be here for a while, the way things go. If you want to go home—”

            “I’ll stay,” Nick said immediately. “But you’re right, I could use a walk. If I find something tasty, I’ll bring it back.”

            His father gave him a mock salute, and gratefully, Nick escaped.

community logo
Join the studiomcah Community
To read more articles like this, sign up and join my community today
4
What else you may like…
Videos
Podcasts
Posts
Articles
October 27, 2021
Cursive Practice Video, to Relax

Or at least, I intend it to be relaxing. Hopefully it delivers.
4:22 minutes

Materials:

00:04:27
Overview of the First Oil Paint Experiment

In which I talk about the paper, the paint, and the experience of oils versus gouache. Fun stuff, will do more.

Thank you Locals supporters! Your contribution to my art war chest here is what's powering these experiments and videos. For now I'm keeping them public but I may start doing some subscriber-only videos if you all are interested.💖

00:03:35
Video Review: Oil Painting Papers

My initial review on receipt of the three oil paper products I ordered: the Canson pad, the Rembrandt block, and the Arches single sheets.

00:01:54
November 09, 2021
Alysha Misc

Thanks for your comments yesterday on the business post... all very provocative, in a good way. I'll try to respond to all of them today.

Some Alysha misc now, since I'm gearing up for the results of the Kickstarter!

Petrov is giving away coupon codes for every book in the Alysha series (and has some leftover coupons for Marda and the business book). You can pick those up here (and please do! The books are bought already, someone should use them!) https://twitter.com/PetrovNeutrino/status/1457344535843987461

Our own @JudasComplex sent along a sample of the Faith in the Service audiobook, which I've attached for your delight! I... haven't had a chance to listen to it. Don't ask me about my past week and a half or so. Putting it here will guarantee I get to it.

After hearing the amused comments during the livestream, I went ahead and added all the ship type illustrations I have inked from the 90s to the wiki. Glory in the rampant adorableness of their anthropomorphic stylings! See those ...

Alysha Misc
The Jaguar's Heart 7: We Are Not a Monolith

A little comedy today, at least in the link. Transcript follows.


Hi, all. Welcome to this episode of The Jaguar’s Heart.

A while back I was introduced to a comedy sketch about Cuban coffee by a Mexican comedian, Gabriel Iglesias. ( The sketch begins with him greeting all his fellow Latinos and then backing up to say ‘but we’re all different, aren’t we’ which is a segue into a demonstration of how different Hispanics speak Spanish.

It is hilarious. First, because I am a Spanish speaker and a linguistics hobbyist, and his portrayal of various accents resonated with my experiences in trying to make sense of them myself… Not always easy, since from culture to culture, slang and accent are often totally different (and sometimes grammar! Spaniards use a grammatical construct that has died out in many other Spanish-speaking countries, the plural “you.”)

I also loved it because the Cuban coffee part is real. I grew up with Cubans. I know how we are....

The Jaguar's Heart 7: We Are Not a Monolith
The Jaguar's Heart 6: Hatespeech

One of the most common things I hear (and say) right now is "the asymmetry is the story." Here's one about how none of us are innocent of the sins we hate in others.


Hi, all. Welcome to this week’s episode of The Jaguar’s Heart.

It’s been weeks since the Baen’s Bar incident and I’m still thinking about it... because the longer I do, the more I feel, overwhelmingly, that it’s obvious that the problem is deeper than “this forum was saying stuff that offended us.” We have to back up to the glaring fact that people on opposite sides no longer consider each other human. Nothing I say will matter because the people disagreeing with me don’t think I’m human. They have denied my humanity; they have not bothered to listen to my beliefs, or have fake-listened to them in that way that people do when they’re so ready to prove you wrong that they’re only using your speech to provide talking points for their own ideas.

We have forgotten how to listen.

Increasingly, we have also ...

The Jaguar's Heart 6: Hatespeech
Exile 2 is live!

A few days early, on my shop; I was planning the 15th but I got it done faster than I planned. You can get it right now from my shop in ebook or paperback: https://studiomcah.com/products/an-exile-amid-stars-shieldmatron-2

Or, if you prefer, you can wait for the retail edition (ebook and paperback). Those links are here: https://books2read.com/shieldmatron2

I've also wrapped up the FireBorn's Legacy Kickstarter and sent out that update, so... I think that's everything that was on my plate for this year. I am thinking of going back to writing the gamelit (finally!) and maybe doing a Christmas story! I'll actually be able to breathe and think about that. Excited!

Anyway, grab the book if you're wanting to.🧡

November 06, 2024
Any Word Requests?

Typo checks and first reader reports are coming in at a good clip on Surela 2 - thank you all! I'm going to start formatting this weekend and should have that wrapped up shortly.

Meanwhile, I'm looking at everything I've dropped to finish Exile Amid Stars (including re-reading the gamelit novel to see where I left off!). But I'd also like to do some conlang work, so this is an open call for requests for words! I'm assuming Ai-Naidari, but if you want to know words in other languages (the Jokka's, or Chatcaavan, or Faulfenzair, or whatever!), let me know.

Reminder also that I'm doing one card readings from my balance deck on Discord, so if you'd like one, let me know there. It's happening in channel #other-stuff.🙂

But anyway, yes. Word requests, if you have them!

October 29, 2024
Beta Reader Alert!

I'll be finishing the draft of Surela 2 tomorrow, and will probably wrap up my personal revisions on it by the end of the week. Which means if you're interested in being on the beta reader team, you should clear the decks for the beginning of next week!

My recommended re-reads going into this one are Surela 1 and FireBorn's Legacy.

Wiki spoilers will probably start going up this week as I finalize my edits and start adding things to entries so that first readers can do research/double-check things, so be advised!

If you prefer to wait, I'm guessing this one will be available for direct sale (from my shop) by mid/end of November, and at retail in December. I'll have a pre-order page up probably by Nov 15 at the latest.

I know I've been quiet and putting all the things on hold, but the book was only 25,000 words long at the beginning of September and it's now 100,000 (and still going). I've dropped everything to get this done in time for a 2024 release, and it's been eating my brain ...

February 02, 2024
post photo preview
Gamelit Novel Index

The chapter titles are all a mess. But this is the proper order so far:

Gamelit 1 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4241337/gamelit-novel-first-chapter

Gamelit 2 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4255477/gamelit-novel-last-bit-of-chapter-1

Gamelit 3 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4267366/gamelit-novel-chp2-part1

Gamelit 4 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4267371/gamelit-novel-chp2-final

Gamelit 5 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4298755/gamelit-novel-chp-3-part-1

Gamelit 6 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4330428/gamelit-chp-3-part-2

Gamelit 7 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4331116/gamelit-chap-4-pt-1

Gamelit 8 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/4361942/gamelit-chp-4-last-bit

Gamelit 9 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5215305/gamelit-novel-chapter-3

Gamelit 10 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5244861/gamelit-novel-10

Gamelit 11 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5271216/gamelit-novel-11

Gamelit 12 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5301971/gamelit-novel-12

Gamelit 13 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5326625/gamelit-novel-13

Gamelit 14 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5360605/gamelit-novel-14

Gamelit 15 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5385714/gamelit-novel-15

Gamelit 16 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5418577/gamelit-novel-16

Gamelit 17 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5444360/gamelit-novel-17

Gamelit 18 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5475518/gamelit-novel-18

Gamelit 19 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5502726/gamelit-novel-19

Gamelit 20 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5530518/gamelit-novel-20

Gamelit 21 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5558728/gamelit-novel-21

Gamelit 22 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5586451/gamelit-novel-22

Gamelit 23 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5613544/gamelit-novel-23

Gamelit 24 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5642711/gamelit-24

Gamelit 25 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5668799/gamelit-25

Gamelit 26 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5693714/gamelit-26

Gamelit 27 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5722853/gamelit-27

Gamelit 28 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5747793/gamelit-28

Gamelit 29 - https://studiomcah.locals.com/post/5772301/gamelit-29

Read full Article
October 25, 2024
Meta-Conversations: Wisdom
Read full Article
October 03, 2024
post photo preview
NecronomiCon 2024
Chillaxin' in Florida

Last weekend I decided to return to my local convention, NecronomiCon, after over eight years, to see how things had changed… and also because I missed in-person socializing. Fortunately, the con didn’t mind my signing up at the last minute, and put me on panels and sold me a writer’s alley table, so I was able to go all three days and sell a few books.

Briefly, about Necro: 2024 is its 43rd year, and it's never missed a year, even when they were forced to do a zoom version. It’s a nonprofit con of the old science fiction style, with panel programming, gaming, an art show, and a dealer’s room. In the past, it’s been fairly large, but the arrival of the enormous for-profit ComicCons have obviously cut into its attendance. The vendors I talked to said last year there were 400-500 people. This year, because of the hurricane, we probably had a quarter of that number, if that. Seven of the guests canceled because they couldn’t physically reach the con, and in fact, the committee wasn’t even sure if they’d be able to run it until three days before they were scheduled!

But it did run, and I’m glad it did, because it was a low key and relaxing event… less like a con and more like a weekend spent catching up with friends. Prior to my hiatus, I was a regular at this con, and was surprised how many people remembered me from back then; the woman who started the con came by to reminisce about how young and shiny I was when she first met me, and since she met me in the 90s, this was a legitimate observation…!

This brings me to the fact that the con skews a little old, but there were more small children than I’m used to seeing at cons, which was nice. (Especially after the tantrum some of the local furry cons threw about requiring attendees to be 18+). Since the hotel’s on university property, I talked with one of my table buddies about posting fliers on campus to attract some new people. The game room ran 24x7 all three days with tabletop games, roleplaying, LARPing, and an enormous library available for checkout so people could try something new. There was even a miniature painting contest, and the minis and paints were all supplied for you, and you got to take your figure home. I have to imagine that would be a fun thing to do over a weekend with friends: “let’s get together and play games and socialize”? Sounds like a good time to me!

The rest of the con is more modest in size, but I have to think that’s an opportunity, especially for younger people just starting out. The dealers’ room had maybe 20 vendors, and there were maybe 10-15 writers in the writers’ alley depending on the day. The art show’s panels had many vacancies, also. Though some of that was certainly due to the hurricane, I still think attracting some young adults to step into the shoes of the people who (probably!) want to retire from con-running would be a good idea.

I participated in three panels and one reading, which were almost entirely empty because of the low attendance, but that made it more fun in some ways… you can chat with the audience directly when there’s only a handful of people listening. My topics were “Redemption Arcs in Media,” “Writing the Short and Long of It” (about how to decide how long a story should be), and “The Fascination of the Other,” where I ended up impromptu moderator since we’d lost ours to travel disruptions. These were all companionable discussions, and the other pros entertaining company. I hadn’t planned to participate in the reading but got talked into it by the head of programming, because of the cancellations… so I read the first scene of “Leadership Lessons,” from To Discover and Preserve, because Vera is fun to perform. I tend to prefer funny material for readings, because it raises the energy level of the audience, and gets them responding.

Also good: absolutely no political talk that I heard at all, and the one time someone strayed onto it on a panel, I said, “Let’s not do politics… we’re here to escape,” and the whole audience did a ‘hear hear.’ I also saw signs of heterogeneous beliefs among the attendees, which was great. I’d like to return to a time when fans came from multiple beliefs and united over their shared love of dragons and spaceships.

I spent the entire weekend, when I wasn’t on a panel, behind a table. One of the good things about such a small attendance was it gave me a chance to test my in-person sales procedures. The new Shopify hardware worked perfectly once I figured out how to use it, and 2/3rds of my sales were credit or Apple Pay. One of them was even for an ebook, and the woman who bought it started reading it that night, which was gratifying. The physical set-up wasn’t bad; my new banner is great but I think my table could use some fancifying. I also very obviously need a cart to haul things because Daughter and I carried the boxes of books in and that was not ideal. Lessons learned!

I also feel, based on this con, that I probably wouldn’t be a great fit to sell at the ginormous 40,000-person cons, because what I enjoy is chatting with people and there’s not much chance of that in the crush of a megaconvention. I could be wrong, but people seem more likely to buy from me after talking with me a while. Gambling on numbers over personal connection reminds me too much of the “advertise to large numbers of strangers on Amazon” strategies that never worked well for me. I should probably try a ComicCon to be sure… if I can even get in! Those enormocons have waiting lists for their $700 tables.

I did really enjoy the talking. Two people had already heard of me; one of them bought Mindtouch on sale, and liked it, and another was on my mailing list already. I also received a compliment on my new mcahogarth.org website, which was unexpected. I stripped that site down based on my own frustration with web 2.0… I guess I’m not the only one tired of endless, hyper-polished Wordpress sites.

My sales covered my table and a little more. A third of my sales were of the business book, which makes me happy because I like to think of helping people realize their dreams. The other third were either Mindtouch or Earthrise, and if even one of those readers goes on to read the rest of the series, that’s a serious win. But I wasn’t too focused on making back my expenses… as Daughter observed, “This was an advertising expense. If you made money, that’s on top.”

I’ll be back next year, definitely. If you’re local to Florida, it’s worth considering if you love gaming and like relaxacons!

Read full Article
See More
Available on mobile and TV devices
google store google store app store app store
google store google store app tv store app tv store amazon store amazon store roku store roku store
Powered by Locals